Updated on August 20, 2024
Dealing with Anxiety can be tough, not only for those diagnosed but for those around them.
It most times manifests as consistent feelings of unease, irritability, or restlessness. And it affects everything that has to do with focusing on daily tasks and appetite.
Anxiety disorders are common, as the World Health Organization (WHO) has stated for a fact that, in 2019, about 301 million persons were diagnosed with anxiety,
While, an estimated 4% of the global population is currently experiencing anxiety, making it the most common of all mental disorders.
Common Symptoms Of Anxiety
- Muscle Tensions.
- Panic attacks.
- Difficulty sleeping.
- Feeling nervous and lightheaded.
- Having a sense of impending doom.
- Sweating.
- Increased heart rate.
- Shortness of breath.
- Irritational fears.
- Feeling like the walls are closing in.
20 Things To Not Say To Someone With Anxiety
1. “Calm down”
Telling an anxious person to calm down when they are feeling restless may seem productive, but can worsen the situation.
The reason is that they may want to calm down, but they cannot, at that moment. And this increases their stress level and feelings of helplessness.
2. “Just Relax”
Saying this to a person with anxiety disorder may seem irrational, and more like you are not validating their emotions.
3. “You are Uptight”
Telling a random person this phrase can be considered impolite, or maybe insulting. Now imagine how someone with an anxiety disorder will take it. Many times they are already self-conscious about this attribute of theirs. Therefore, stating the obvious does not help.
4. “It is not a big deal”
This phrase renders the anxious patient’s feeling useless. It invalidates it and makes them feel like they are overreacting.
5. “Why are you Anxious?”
Asking questions like this, might not be best, because it can trigger more damage and harsh reactions. Think from the angle of – if an anxiety disorder patient knew what was causing their distress, they may be able to articulate their thoughts better.
6. “You are being too sensitive”
This is a very inappropriate phrase to make regardless of the situation. It reduces the person’s feelings and suggests that they are exaggerating. And this is outrightly wrong.
7. “I know how you feel”
Avoid saying words like this, even if you have experienced something similar. People react differently to mental disorders, and their experiences may be different from yours. It is also insensitive.
8. “You should let me handle it”
This phrase, rather than offering solutions, undermines a person’s sense of responsibility and confidence to carry out a particular job, and this is dangerous for their well-being. It also sends a message that you think they cannot handle something, and this worsens their anxiety.
9. “Are you sure?”
Asking someone with an anxiety disorder if they are sure about how they feel can be offensive or dismissive. They most likely already know the difference between normal worry and the symptoms they are already going through.
10. “I know what is best for you”
Saying this to someone with anxiety may be considered dismissive and controlling. It dismisses their ability to make decisions for themselves about their mental health.
11. “Stop worrying about it”
This is the worst thing to say to someone with anxiety. An anxiety disorder patient cannot just turn off their emotions like that. By dismissing their emotions, you are showing a lack of empathy.
12. “You are overreacting”
This phrase makes the patient feel like, their anxiety is unwarranted or excessive and it can worsen how they feel. This also shows that you are not sympathetic to their problems.
13. “This what — does to help with Anxiety”
By randomly offering unsolicited advice, on how patients should treat their anxiety disorders, you can come off as pushy or inappropriate. That method may have worked for you, but it doesn’t mean it would automatically work for others.
14. “It is such a nice day!”
There are anxiety disorder patients who suffer from seasonal affective disorder or other weather-related conditions. Phrases like “the weather is beautiful today” or any weather-related phrase can increase their restlessness and add to their challenges.
15. “You need to toughen up”
This phrase is simply unhelpful. It implies that the person is not trying hard or does not have the resilience to combat whatever it is they are going through, when in actual reality they they are trying their best to contain the situation.
16. “You should just try meditation”
Another thing to look out for when communicating with an anxious person is tone. The word “Just”, degrades everything and anything the person may be going through, regardless of the mental problem or situation.
While guided imagery for anxiety is advised, telling a person with anxiety to “just meditate” may not be ideal. This is because their emotions are high, and they are restless.
17. “You are ruining the mood”
This phrase can worsen an anxious person’s situation because they already feel like they are a burden and maybe not wanted there, so dismissing their emotions can worsen their anxiety.
18. “You will be fine”
A lot of people who say this to an anxious person have no idea or lack understanding of anxiety symptoms.
They may not know the gravity of their words, and this just makes the patient pull back, because they will likely assume, you do not want to know their experience.
19. “Can we talk about this later?”
Although there are appropriate times to dismiss or delay a conversation, with anxious patients, you need to know how to maneuver, because they may see it as an avoidance or invalidation of their current feelings.
20. “Be more present”
Many people who have anxiety disorders have problems with being actively present in a setting or space. They simply worry about things that have yet to happen or what may happen in the future.
So asking them to be more present, is like asking them to wave a magic wand and have their anxiety disappear.
Conclusion
Many times anxiety can be overwhelming, and it may be harder by the day to express how you feel as an anxiety patient. The good news is, you do not have to go through it alone.
If you or your loved one is battling with anxiety, seeking professional help might be the best thing you can do to help yourself or the person.
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